A Fun Day with my Bipolar Kid
Guest post by Sarah B
For the past five years, my family have not been able to celebrate Mother’s Day or Father’s Day. Not because we didn’t want to. Not because we didn’t believe in the celebration. The only reason is our young girl, Ashley who was diagnosed to have bipolar disorder when she was fourteen years old. She’s almost twenty years old this year and for the first time since her diagnosis, we were able to celebrate Mother’s Day for my wife and Father’s Day for me. It’s more than what my wife and I could ask for. It was a full day of fun and happiness.
So, let me tell you first how we have been as a family since the day my child was diagnosed to be suffering from bipolar disorder. It came as a shock to all of us. It was nothing we expected. The mood swings, emotional ups and downs, the depression, the overly-happy stance, we had no clue of what was coming to us. We thought of it as a bad dream that would go away the minute we walk out the doctor’s clinic. But sadly enough, the dream was there to stay with us. And stay long it did.
The years that followed to say the least, were difficult, frustrating and most of the times hopelessly impossible. Having a bipolar kid is something no parents would ever wish for. Watching your kid suffering from alternate episodes of depression and mania, was just too painful for both me and my wife that we thought we couldn’t go through another day. Despite the medication and all the other treatment recommendations found to help a bipolar patient, nothing seemed to be working for Ashley. Believe me when I say that we have tried everything within our means and resources but with little success.
Until one Sunday morning two months ago when we woke up to see Ashley looking normal, behaving normally, devoid of any symptoms of the disorder. We can’t point to a particular reason for why it happened but we are very thankful it did happen. She is more in control of her episodes. She is more ‘normal’ and we can’t be grateful enough.
So, how did we celebrate Father’s Day this year? We didn’t have any elaborate plan for the day. I took my wife and daughter to a friend’s log cabin which is a couple of hours drive from our home. We brought our fishing rods, picnic baskets and some overnight clothes. I felt we needed that get-away time. I prayed hard that Ashley will stay in that positive mode the whole time and I thank God for granting my prayers.
The minute we set foot at the log cabin, Ashley flashed a genuine smile we have not seen in a long time. She looked serene and connected to the tranquillity of the place. It was a beautiful sight and I memorized every detail of it in my mind. We went fishing in a nearby lake and caught a couple of trout and Ashley couldn’t get her eyes off the wiggling fish. She was so happy with our catch she asked to have a photo with the fish when we weighed in the fish at the wharf. My wife and I were both tearful seeing her enjoying what she’s doing. This was the Ashley before the diagnosis and the Ashley we would like to come back to us. In the meantime, we are very, very much happy with what God has decided for us to have at the moment.
We went around town, dropping by some souvenir shops. Ashley bought a key holder for me and her mom, with the first letter of our names dangling with the holder. It was the most beautiful and precious gift I can ever have for a Father’s Day. I’m sure my wife felt the same way. We asked people around to take photos of all three of us so we don’t forget how we enjoyed every second of this celebration.
The night we spent in the log cabin was the most peaceful and restful after many years of almost no sleep because we were monitoring and watching over Ashley 24/7. The calm and quiet atmosphere helped Ashley control her symptoms and we all were able to enjoy a day without any bipolar episode. The trip was rather short but nonetheless got us to experience being a family again.
To some people, this celebration is no fun at all! But to my wife and I, this was the most exciting celebration we have indulged in for such a long time. The fun was with the experience of having a normal Ashley for one day! It was enough fun for me and even more than what I prayed for. That was the happiest Happy Father’s Day to me from Ashley. The best!